Life's Little Lamentation

flower, flower can you not be in the sunshine anymore? can you live in darkness and thrive? flower, flower can you not be what the moon wants not? can you forsake the sun and rise? flower, flower can you not be in the sunshine anymore? can you live without water and die? flower, flower can you not be their love? can you live for the moon and for ever?

flower, frail flower bring me the recognition I yearn bring me thy love purest and true for once I yearned to be rich oh, now I long for richness still in recognition I seek fame and thy love of solitude flower, frail flower bring me the light of light bring me the mirror of my face for once a mask I wore oh, now am wearing still in recognition I seek happiness and thy heart my home flower, frail flower bring me the recognition still bring me, bring me that I may myself unveil

You will LOVE Penang for... (picture courtesy of shelby aileen ng) Need I say more??

One thing about emperors that you should know - they are freaking unfortunate, it's so darn hot in that darn costume of theirs. And I wore it for just 15 minutes.. Imagine a day in that costume..fuh...

Sometimes you can be angry for all the wrong reasons. Maybe just a reason. But whatever reasons they may be, it is still silly to be angry for all the wrong reasons. Not that being angry for all the right reasons make it justifiable, but being angry for all the wrong reasons makes you look really stupid. Sometimes you can help it, sometimes not. For whatever reasons that stand behind that considerably clear conscience of yours to help determine the outcome, you tend to not be able to help it. More often than not. Sometimes during times like this I wish I can be as 'detachable' from the situation as how Prof. Morrie displayed through Mitch Albom's book Tuesdays with Morrie . In that novel, he stated the reason that human cannot control their emotion is because we are too occupied IN it. We let it run loose. Then when it's all over, we tend to always forget the experiences that has led us through that painful moment, and we will relive it again and again. The trick, Prof....

The day I almost got it right was the day you left me the day when everything seemed dark and the fine mist cloudy The day I almost got it right was that day I cried that fateful day which turned to night as immediate as dried my eyes The day I almost got it right was the day you left me the day when I felt almost empty the day I took my life

A pious man explained to his followers: "It is evil to take lives and noble to save them. Each day I pledged to save a hundred lives. I drop my net in the lake and scoop out a hundred fishes. I place the fishes on the bank, where they flop and twirl. "Don't be scared," I tell those fishes. "I am saving you from drowning." Soon enough, the fishes grow calm and lie still. Yet, sad to say, I am always too late. The fishes expire. And because it is evil to waste anything, I take those dead fishes to market and I sell them for a good price. With the money I receive, I buy more nets so I can save more fishes. - Anonymous Does that passage reflect who you are sometimes? Does it feel as though you are reading your own doings being portrayed in a very metaphorical way? For once in the blog, I am providing neither questions nor answers. PLEASE think for yourself. Wish the sadness that resides will so much as cease to hurt; wishing that by dreading the agony it will ...

Why is the straight road not straight? It seems many have treaded upon it, their own justifications The straight road seems less straight when you walking straight, pull your eyes to the lines Soon you find, that no man can see it straight many found it less straight, for all the things done reflected the solemnity and purged the present reflects the deflatable den Now strange it seems less straight but many found joy treading on it, for a road less straight gives the more of difference experiences the road which seems less straight

Perhaps love is doing the things you hate with the one you love Perhaps love is not understanding what she says yet listens attentively Perhaps love is giving yourself explanations on behalf of her Perhaps love is not blind; just that you close your eyes Perhaps love is being angry and happy at the same time Perhaps love is being sad and joyous at the same moment Perhaps love is nothing but an undisturbed pond Perhaps it is rough like the mighty sea Perhaps, Perhaps love is doing the things you hate with the one you love

I know why the blind girl across the street can cry so much I know it when I do not cry I know when your world is completely dark you don't cry as much I know why the blind girl across the street can fret so much I know it when my heart becomes numb I know when your world seems completely fine that's when you cry that much I know why the blind girl across the street can cry so much I know it when I do not cry I know when your world is completely dark you don't cry as much I know why the blind girl cries alas She lost the thing she needed to last I know when your world seems lack of one most needed thing; You don't cry as much as the blind girl who cries

-If that's the road to freedom, why not choose it and end all tyrannies? -If that's the path to immortality, why not take it and end all mortalities? -If that's the way to impossibility, why not for the sake of all possibilities? -If that's the road to eternity, why not for you and me?

I have to comment on it. Not so much of comments actually. More of an introduction of a book, the second book in my life so far that has managed to bring tears to my eyes. the five people you meet in heaven I am sure many of us think about heaven. Life after death. More Heavens. And paradise. I am sure none of us have the guts to really say they understand what heaven is, and how it looks like. Nobody's sure. Nobody even knows the answer. And the ones who might know cannot even tell you because they are "away". And that's how I found myself reading this book yesterday. There are two reasons why I chose this book yesterday. First being many have read it and thought it good, the other being the reason I stated earlier. Moreover, I found myself truly engrossed in the book, an experience that has eluded me ever since I started tertiary education; an irony being the demands of my course. It's rare to see me reading books nowadays. It's even more uncommonly rare to ...

Are cries of tears alone? Or eternal anguish of the heart set by the fireplace around a cold, cold chamber and cry of cries alone? Are cries of tears alone? Or ambient music to the ears framed by the joy of feeling the pain and cry of cries alone? Are cries of tears alone? Or soothing smell to the nose unveiled of mysteries of the body and soul and cry of cries alone? Are cries of tears alone? Or eternal anguish of the heart set to freeze and burn with vengeance and cry of cries alone?

This is one of those times that I can really feel like crying but then I cannot. Sometimes it hurts real bad if you're suddenly disappointed. The feeling is like that of being on top of a ladder, enjoying a picturesque and panaromic view and then out of a sudden the ladder gives in to your weight, fall sideways and you come crashing down to good-old Earth. Sometimes it can be much higher still. Maybe on top of a building. Or clouds perhaps. But all these do matter not. Whether or not you die after you crashed or just suffer from few minor blemishes, you have fallen still, short of what you expect to have before all the hopes come crashing down with the disappointment leading the way. It is sad. Yes it is. But you ask yourself while typing this down with trembling fingers - Is it worth the toil of your heart when many other things are waiting for you up there? If only you can just stand up, take a deep breath, take hold of the fallen ladder and lean it up against the wall again, you...

People say a hundred thousand eagles cry whenever you cry but the thunderous sound they must make seems eerily silent. You are breathing heavily, enchanted breathing the silence melts all but the soul as the soul unlocks the heart but the mind it chains. Then you seem to soar, an eagle's waiting for scheming thieves to come beside you, around you all over you. Somehow you mutter softly, so softly so defiantly cruel to the ears as the heart experiences the beauty of benevolence. People say a hundred thousand eagles cry whenever you cry but i say they rejoice, they rejoice Mocking justice and void of vendetta.

It's really funny that I should be writing this in a cyber cafe. Not that cyber cafes aren't meant for stuffs like this, but merely the fact that it's the norm now to associate cyber cafes with gaming. And also the fact that I am almost bored to death that prompted me to start. I cannot really explain the feeling that I have now. I know, I know. It's called loneliness to some, or rather most. But then, it explains but half of the feelings I am feeling right now. Let me put it this way. It is one feeling that you will feel if 1) suddenly you have 2 months free of everything but yourself 2) suddenly for the next 14 days you will not be seeing the one you love the most 3) suddenly for the next 14 days too, you will be doing some boring stuffs unworthy of mention 4) suddenly you are left alone for the night before leaving home for almost a month 5) suddenly you find yourself sitting in between 2 gamers totally engrossed in another session of dota and you are there typing th...

Sometimes it's perfectly normal for someone to feel disappointed at something someone else had done because it's normal, and there's nothing bigger in this world for that someone at that moment, because the someone that he is disappointed at is the most special person for him. But it is also perfectly normal for you to not play a game when she's playing it. And I can betcha that she's playing extremely well too. So while you are disappointed, the feelings that you will have at that particular moment are those comparable to someone who has just had his heart stabbed. The pain that comes with it is indescribable. You wish that all has never happened. That all remaineth but a dream. So those sometimes make you feel that you want to just let it go, the race to be abandoned. I can assure you that no matter what you do, you will still think of the race. I know it's incomplete, but you will just cherish the journey that had been travelled so far, and enjoy the presence...

The start of the match. I was going at full speed. Vigorously charging down at midfielders, sweeping past the defenders and there's only the keeper to beat. The maiden shot was blocked. There were times in the match, the first half; discouraging moments I have. The ball I shot was either heading towards the hands of the keeper to be deflected, or else heading towards the spectators. I was silenced by the beauty of sadness beyond words, or in this case, kicks. Those times were just times that can pull you so deep down under the currents of spectating pressures that you felt no matter how many saving tackles you made, how brave your header was, or how brilliant your footwork was, it's just the ball over the line that will matter. Nothing else. Second half's beckoning. With a blow of the whistle the battle's started. And a blow of the whistle for 5 more times signalled the beginning of a duel; the keeper and myself. The goal is in front of me now. I step up to position mys...

I know when he's been on your mind That distant look is in your eyes I thought with time you'd realize it's over, over It's not the way I choose to live And something somewhere's gotta give A share in this relationship gets older, older You know I'd fight for you but how could I fight someone who isn't even there I had the rest of you now I want the best of you I don't care if that's not fair Coz I want it all Or nothing at all There's nowhere left to fall When you reach the bottom it's now or never Is it all Or are we just friends Is this how it ends With a simple telephone call You leave me here with nothing at all There are times it seems to me I'm sharing you with memories I feel it in my heart but I don't show it, show it Then there're times you look at me As thought I'm all that you could see Those times I don't believe it's right I know it, know it Don't make me promises baby you never did know how to keep t...

You know you are fooling everyone but yourself if you're happy in front of everyone except her. Sometimes you cannot help but feel angry, because you know you shouldn't have fallen for her. But since you have, you will try your very best to fake happiness when you are with her, and sooner or later you notice it's not just this relationship that is in jeopardy, but also the relationship between you and your friends. You know that sometimes you just cannot lie to your heart, because it does not. And since it doesn't, the best part is that it forces you to fall in love with someone you shouldn't have fallen for, and that makes you think of all sorts of nonsensical things and do all kind of stupid stuffs for her. Maybe time will tell you that it is not going to work, but it just seems, more often than not, that you will not listen. You know too sometimes you manage to get the answer that you are looking for but not the answer that you want. You will just force yourself ...